How do I know if I need therapy?

Going to therapy is much more common and far less stigmatized than at any other point in history.

As conversations about mental health and therapy become increasingly normalized, many people might be wondering, “do I need to go to therapy?”

The short answer is that everyone can benefit from therapy. Like anything, you get out what you put in.

The longer answer involves addressing the concept of need — which is less straightforward.

**Who needs therapy?**

There is a difference between therapy for growth & healing and help for a crisis.

“A mental health crisis or emergency is a life-threatening situation in which an individual is imminently threatening harm to self or others, severely disorientated or out of touch with reality, has a severe inability to function, or is otherwise distraught.” — Honolulu Community College Wellness Center

When someone is experiencing a mental health crisis, their life may be at risk. A crisis requires immediate action.

Briefly, a mental health crisis could look like:

having suicidal thoughts or having developed a plan for suicide
feeling invincible and taking dangerous risks or making drastic changes
experiencing hallucinations, feeling paranoid, feeling unsure of what is real anymore and/or questioning reality

You may need support if you or somebody you know is experiencing a mental health crisis. Across Canada and the US, there are mental health crisis lines — the trained staff and volunteers can provide some immediate support and suggest next steps. In some cities, there are mobile crisis teams and other services that can help with things like de-escalation and assessment; in other places, the only options may be to call 9-1-1 or visit the nearest Hospital Emergency Room.

A mental health crisis is likely best addressed by a team of medical professionals who can keep someone physically safe and work toward increased mental stability. In the case of a mental health crisis, there will likely be psychiatrists and other health care professionals (like doctors and nurses) involved.

In short, if someone is experiencing a mental health crisis, they need immediate care. It might not look like therapy straight away, but they may need professionals' support to stay safe.

Who could benefit from therapy?

Mental wellness is about more than simply not being in crisis, and it’s not only people in crisis who could use support.

If we compare our mental health to a house, this might make things clearer:

Mental health crisis = the house is on fire. This requires an emergency response; in this case, the fire department is called.
Mental illness = the house is in a constant state of disrepair. Perhaps the electrical work was improperly installed and is a fire hazard. Maybe it’s gotten beyond the point of messy; perhaps there are some hoarding tendencies. Nothing is working, and things keep breaking at the same time. It’s overwhelming.
Mental wellness = the house needs regular upkeep, but it’s safe and comfortable overall. You’re thinking ahead to anticipate maintenance, and you enjoy your home.

Using this analogy, we can think about therapy as the work to repair and/or upkeep the house.

While we believe that everyone — even very happy people — could benefit from therapy, there are some common reasons people seek out a therapist. Some reasons people seek support can include if they are:

Concerned about their substance use
Feel as though their relationships are suffering
Have concerns about their mood or behaviours; for example, if they’re irritable and lashing out at others
Struggling to function day-to-day
Experiencing repeating patterns or cycles that they wish to break free from
Facing a transition (like marriage, divorce, job loss, having children, grief and loss, retirement, and so on)
Feeling conflicted, stuck, or lost

Why should I go to therapy when I could just do self-care, self-help, or peer support?

There has been a lot of buzz about self-care for the past few years.

Self-care activities, like eating well, exercising, getting enough sleep, connecting with others, pursuing hobbies, journaling, practicing gratitude, and avoiding or limiting substances, can significantly benefit our mental health.

Most therapists encourage their clients to practice self-care. For some people, consistent self-care routines are enough to feel mentally well, and that’s wonderful!

For others, despite having good self-care routines, it’s not enough for them to feel mentally well. In that case, therapy could be a great next step.

There is also a booming self-help industry. From authors to coaches, social media influencers and bloggers, many people from different backgrounds have ideas on mental wellness and finding joy and fulfillment.

In the world of self-help and self-improvement, some information and advice is based on academic research and some is based solely on people’s life experiences. Life experience, while valuable, isn’t generalizable. This means that what was true for one person may not be accurate for you.

Self-help books or content can be helpful, but they can also be misleading.

It's unfortunate that, as the consumer, looking into the credibility of information sources falls to you. When in doubt, look for information coming from research institutions such as universities or teaching hospitals. It’s worth keeping a critical eye on what we find in the world of self-help.

There are also many avenues for peer support.

Peer support is when we receive help, encouragement, and/or empathy from people who are not medical professionals but who may have had similar experiences. Alcoholics Anonymous is a widely-known group that uses a peer support model.

The mutual care and support that people can receive with a group who have had similar experiences can be very powerful. Like self-care, peer support may be enough for some people, yet others may still need more.

There are limits to what our peers can provide as well. While our peers might be able to provide a kind of camaraderie we don’t get in one-on-one therapy, they cannot provide expert-level treatment for mental illness.

So why not do both? Peer support, together with therapy, can provide more holistic support for our mental well-being.

Alternatively, folks may want to consider group therapy, to get some of the benefits of both guidance from a therapist and the support of a group.

So what should I think about if I consider going to therapy?

Here are three things we think are important to consider when thinking about going to therapy:

Therapy is a place for healing, learning, and growth. You will get out what you put into it. It is an investment of time, money, and energy.
(Stay tuned for an upcoming article on knowing whether or not you’re ready to go to therapy!)
Therapy isn’t a magical cure-all. Change takes time. Some things may never change. You won’t know until you try.
(Stay tuned for an upcoming article on what you should expect at therapy)
You might need to shop around to find a therapist that you ‘click’ with. The relationship you have with your therapist is key. If one therapist doesn’t fit for you— don’t feel discouraged — keep looking for someone else!
(Stay tuned for an upcoming article on finding a therapist)

Do you still have questions about therapy? Reach out to us!